I think this is that longest I've gone without posting(6 months). I am still managing a restaurant. There are good and bad days, but mostly bad. I really despise being there. Good news is I just got a call and I have a 2nd interview with Natco Inc. They distribute food and supplies over new england to various restaurants. I would be working in sales with a nice base salary and huge bonus potential and WEEKENDS FUCKING OFF for the first time in seven years or so, which would be very nice. I'm also dating the same girl, Cate. Today is ten months, so thats pretty damn good for me lately. hehe. But yeah, it's going very well and I have yet to get bored....she treats me awesome and makes me very happy. What else? I want to get a Wiiii! and a DS....and I thought I was completely done with nintendo after the last ten years have been shit. I'm thinking a game with any kind of sword fighting on the Wii would be pretty badass. In other news, Scott got engaged a couple months back. They're happy. Now his girl is living here rent free which is pretty much bullshit, and she got him a dog for xmas which barks and annoys and pisses/shits on floors which is even more bs, but whatever. Playing games and such has dwindled since she's been here all the time and its just no where near the same. So in five months or so I'll be getting a place of my own and then my living space can once again be peacefull. Oh...in the spring I'm most likely going to be playing soccer one night per week, which is awesome. I can't wait...I've been such a lazy fuck for a long time now(in regards to sports/working out). So yeah...that pretty much everything as of late. I'll try to update more often.

so i've been sitting here doing pretty much nothing for five hours or so...since i got off work. Cate's been gone for 9 days now...i'm not supposed to see her till friday...but now that might not even happen. It sucks seeing someone pretty much everyday and then not at all or once for a month. A couple days before she left I was gone for 8 days in Florida. She should be landing in boston anytime now from cali....but then its straight to maine with her fam. (actually she just texed saying she landed.) Oh well. Sooo...what else. I woke up late this morning. I don't know why...i never heard my alarm go off and then i get a phone call at 10:30 asking where i'm at. Inventory has to be done by 11....so yeah...that didn't happen. I did it really quick but it was 11:30 by the time I was done....which meant i needed to call my boss and let him know that he has to call it in manually because i overslept....so...that sucks. A couple weeks back I was in florida..it was fun. A couple of the days were pretty lame though. Also, one of my friends was with me from boston part of the time and she can be a bit much. Since we got back, i barely talk to her. Also a couple weeks ago, I moved into a new apartment. It's probably the nicest place i've ever had and its like a block from the beach and i'm quite happy with it. I feel like i'm in a safe area for the first time in a long time. Quincy sucked really bad and it made it pretty depressing living up here. Now i have a gym and a heated pool and a hot tub too :p. It kinda reminds me of the apartment I had in tallahassee but nicer. Ohh...that made me think of po boys. Oh how i love that place. Thats about all thats going on since the last time i posted anything. It'll probably be a long time till i do again. Nothing really happens thats worth posting on a frequent basis. Maybe i'll start posting weather reports...

Sooooo....whats new....here we go.....In feb. I went down to florida with my boy eric. We stayed at morelli's house. That whole week was awesome! We had vip passes to the disturbed concert(which meant meeting band people and free yager shots and beer all night). That weekend was also gasparilla (just like mardi gras). Again we were vip status at a club down there. I can't remember the name of it....but the vip upstairs section had a ton of big sofa's, a dance floor, and two bars. Each sofa belonged to a certain brand(like capt morgan, yager, etc.) We also had two balcony's to ourselves. The rest of the nights were fun too, went to different bars, saw a crack house, played the game GUN with a pimp, sang kareoke, went to the beach...we rented a convertable for the week too. I really didn't want to leave...I feel so much more me down there....just really comfortable. A few weeks later, Katie and I broke up. We were both fine about it....wasen't going anywhere...was getting increasingly boring. So, now were just friends and it's fine. I'm actually about to go get a bite to eat with her in a few min (fajitas at friday's are the shit!) So, since i haven't been single in like 10 months....I've been going out quite a bit and having fun. Nichcole and I are like really good friends again. We go out every thursday and it's usually something pretty fun. Last thursday we went to a comedy club in Boston and the guy hypnotizes audience members and makes them do crazy shit on stage. It was pretty funny. I think we're going to cambridge tomorrow to see an improv show. Last weekend we had a party at Eric's house. It was cool, but I ended up getting like 1 hour of sleep and had to work 11 hours the next day....so I was hurting pretty bad. It was worth it though, cause I met a bunch of cool people. Oh...work and school are okay. Nothing new except I got a new boss and he's a dick. Whatever. In three weeks eric and I are on a cruise to the keys and Cozumel. So thats gonna be awesome. I'll post again when i get back.

I almost won the lottery last week. Just five numbers off. Bullshit. Work is going pretty well. I'm told I am doing a very good job lately, but I don't really feel like I am. I slack off quite a bit...mainly because I'm sick of dealing with hungary bitcy people. It pays quite well though....so I shouldn't complain too much. I'm also going on another cruise because of it. April 6th I'll be off to key west and then cozumel. That will be a lot of fun. This wednesday I'm going down to St. Pete with my friend Eric. We're renting a convertible and chilin with morelli for six days. It'll be nice to get out of the cold weather. I'm craving some cuban food. There's absolutely none up here. This winter hasn't been too bad actually, but I still don't like it. I got direct tv installed a couple days ago and got rid of comcast. It's pretty sweet. Watching lightning games in HD is fucking awesome. It's like you're in the stands. School is going alright. I'm just sick of it. I've learned a while ago how to get by without really doing much. After working and watching tv and going on my computer, it doesn't leave much time to read. Although, I got all b's last semester. All you have to do is speak up and talk about bullshit in class and write good papers. I'm hoping I'll be done with school by the time I'm 30. That'd be nice. I wish I could take more credits and get it over with. Realistically I've still got like another year and a half. It's pathetic. I'm still with Katie. It's nine months soon. She's one of the nicest people I've ever known. I find myself really bored and easily annoyed when we hang out lately though. Maybe it's just me....I'm trying to work on it. I'm hoping that going to florida in a couple days will help....just to be apart for a little while and be with my friends. Thats about all thats going on lately. Oh...I think Scarlett Johanson is my new fav hottie actress now. Katie Holmes is pretty fucking crazy and knocked up now that Tom got to her. It's such a shame. Alright....peace in your crease.

Hi everyone I'm never in contact with anymore. I don't ever feel like writing in here because there's never really anything different going on. My life now days is this big weekly routine. Whatever day of the week it is...say tuesday...I'll probably be doing the exact same shit the next tuesday. Thats just how it is. I work, I go to class, write papers, try to catch a lightning game on tv, hang out with katie. Sometime we go to friday's and I get jalipino steak fajitias and get a tall amstel light. Thats pretty much it. Sundays I finally have a break from everything and just sit and drool while watching football. I joined this fantasy football thing at the beginning of the year because my brothers girlfriends brother needed one more player to have a league. So I joined not giving a shit about it, but have been kicking ass all season and am in first place, and now I check my scores non stop on sundays and get mad when I don't play the right guy. Thats the extent of the excitement I've been having lately. I wish I was traveling and seeing other countries like you guys and not stuck in this bullshit job in the freezing cold, but thats just how it is. I don't mean to sound like I'm unhappy because I'm really not...everythings just dull...and it's ok...but it is what it is...and there's nothing really to write on here about anything...so i don't. I have like 35 pages of shit to write this weekend for final papers, so that'll be fun. I wish I was in tenth grade again. Wasen't really dealing with girl shit yet, didn't work much at all. Just went to school, after school mike and I would go to the bayfit gym and I'd sign in with his dad's id card. Then we'd get something to eat and play playstation for a while before soccer practice. Then we'd go to practice, school everyone for a couple hours and that'd be the day. No worries or obligations or bills. Now all my friends are in different parts of the country/world and I'm here just going through my routine so I can pay the bills. I've been playing the lottery the last month or so...nothing yet. So for now it all continues and its ok, but its not interesting or anything worth talking about. So if I don't update for a while, just re-read this, cause when I do update it'll be some version of the same shit. I hope all of you are well and happy in life and I appreciate the occasional questions about where i've been. Hopefully we'll all get to hang out again in the not too distant future. Well...it's 15 degrees and even though the heat's on, I'm freezin. So i'm gonna lay in bed for a bit before class. Oh..if you people are on aim....i'm on that alot more often then I check this...my new sn is JRSTBL(not really new, but for those of you that have my old one). Anywho...thats all folks.

whats up everyone? Yeah, I don't use this thing anymore...I'll try to more often. But yeah, I've been seeing katie for a few months now...it's usually pretty nice...a couple 'fights' here and there...but over-all comfortable. Next Tues I'm going down to st. pete for the week. Stayin with morelli. It'll be nice to be back for a little while. I'm transferring restaurants when I get back from vacation. I'll be taking over the one in cohassett. It's much nicer and slower(give me time to do school work when it starts up in a couple weeks) and I'll be working with my friend Eric. So...looking forward to that. No more ghetto. The one I'm currently at got robbed at gunpoint a couple weeks back. That was fun. Umm...I think thats about itsy. So yeah...gonna go shave and pack a bag for tonight and tomorrow night(stayin with the katie at the place she's house-sitting for her rich boss. Sleep number bed, jacuzzi, phone that announces who's calling..pretty nice.) Then it's off to work. Alright...peace in your crease everyone.

I never update this thing anymore.....probably cause nobody reads it. So...new shit: I now have my own crappy pizza/sub place. Got promoted like a couple weeks ago...so now it's my store...name on the door and more money all that good shit. It's good cause I can make my own schedule but it kinda sucks cause everyone looks to you for everything and they call me like 10 times on my days off. I've also been kinda seeing this girl...Katie. She's cute, extremely nice, seemingly innocent, an ice skater, and a smart college chick. For some reason she likes my pessimistic ass quite a bit. She's probably the best girl to come around in long time....however....I'm having a hard time caring about her. I really want to....but so far nothings happening for me. What else....umm...Better Than Ezra came out with a new cd today. It's their first cd in 4 years and it's really good. Also...the Gin Blossoms who haven't had a cd since like '96 are coming out with a new one soon...pretty narley. Oh...I also got all B's in my classes this semester. I realize thats not saying much...but for me it is because I haven't tried at all in school in a couple years and my grades were going to shit....and this semester I actually put some effort towards school...not nearly as much as I can...but more then I have in a long time. Hey if you're doing laundry and there's only one washer and dryer...and some dude has his damp shit sitting in the dryer for over an hour....would you not take his stuff out and dry your clothes?? Anyways....I'm going to go clean the pieces to an over-sized tangerine. Till next time. Hey mike, chris, eugene...miss you guys...it's getting lonely here in the states.

why do people give a fuck what songs bush has on his fucking i-pod???????

well it's been quite some time since i've written anything in here. i'm doing pretty good. Work sucks as always, but i'm next in line to have my own restaurant, so i guess thats good, even though i don't want to do it much longer. School is going ok. i'm relying on my papers to keep my grades pretty good. i really don't have the time to read 11 books while i'm working 48 hours/week and write papers....so my writing is helping me stay in B-ish range. romantic life is non-existant. i just stopped hanging out with this girl...she was crazy about me...still is.....i just couldn't care less about her. i feel kinda assholish, but i couldn't let that go too long....it would just hurt her more the longer it went. thats all it is lately...go out, meet some girl...hook up a couple times...don't really like her for her...she gets attached to me. then once and a while, i'll find someone i really like and would consider romantic, serious stuff with....and she wants nothing to do with me. why can't it ever be mutual? why can't i act the way i do around the one's i don't like, around the one's i like? sigh...whatever...i got fucked up last night, talked to nichcole for a couple hours about how she knows that we're good together, but she's choosing the unknown, new, exciting guy instead, and making the same stupid fucking decision that she regrets making 6 months ago. she said don't me mad at her, she doesn't know what to say and she's sorry and she didn't expect to meet justin(who is 19 and lives with his fucking g/f), but she likes him and has to see where it leads. at that point i decided it was time to drink and smoke and take a break from myself. next thing i know, i'm waking up and it's 5:10 pm. needless to say, today was a rather short day. i woke up, took a shower, got a haircut, did some laundry, watched the movie "love actually"(quite good) and now it's 3:27 am. my first class starts in 5 hours...so i guess it's bed time.

so i've been sick for a copule days. I tried to call into work today for the 2nd time in a year...didn't work eithor time. "We need you, there's no manager from 3-5." So one of the two mother fuckers that's scheduled off at 3 can't stay 2 hours...give me a fucking break...friday night I stayed an extra 4 hours to close because the closing manager called in sick. I'm so sick of that fucking place. So yea...I'm supposed to go down to some bullshit class at like 8 am till 5....but just left my dm a message saying i'm not going. So it'll be my first successful call in sick attempt ever. I just took some nyquil...starting to feel it a bit. It's pretty awesome stuff. Girl stuff real quick....just met my 3rd in like the last 3 weeks....she seems nice....hoping this one isn't going to let her crazy out as soon as the others have lately. School starts in a week. That'll be good, but my free time is gonna go bye bye. So here's to one more week of not doing shit when i'm not at work. goodnight.

lonely

So last night caitlin came over for the first time in like 6 months. It was nice. We watched tv for a while, cuddled a bit and ended up making out for a while. She left kinda wierd afterwards, but overall the night was pretty good. We talked for a while today and it went well. Then tonight. I just talked to nichcole for like 2 1/2 hours. Her and mark broke up....because he thinks that she's been cheating on him w/me and wants to kill me....but whatever....she never cheated on him w/me. But yea...she talked about whats going on with them for a while...then the rest of the time was just talking and flirting and making eachother laugh and....it's just different talking to her. Everything flows so well...there's no boring silece....it just feels right....I can say absolutely anything to her and be completely comfortable....it's like talking one of my guy friends i've known all my life. But yea...she's soo determined to try to work things out with that crazy fuck. I know she's been on and off with the guy for a couple years...but i just don't understand how someone can put themselves through all the constant fighting and mistrust...especially when there's someone else that she gets along great with, and has never had a fight with, and treats her amazingly......the only explanatin there ever is.....but, i love him. Anyways....girls are fucked. I'm going to take both situations very cautiously. Caitlin's cool and all....but i remember how crazy she can get...i'll just have to wait and see what happens.

I never update this thing anymore. Thanksgiving was pretty horrible. I got to see mom and dad, so that was cool. Other then that it was a bunch of screaming kids and a barking dog and a fucking snowman that wouldn't shut his jolly mouth. What else...oh...i'm a student again. Tomorrow officially. Feels kinda good, but at the same time I feel like I'm getting out of touch with the whole process of doing well in classes. Its been so long since i've studied for something...or cared about studying. But, i'm telling myself that I'm really going to try this semester. My gpa is shit, and I'm determined to get it up. If only i wasent working 50 hours/week....sigh. I haven't been dating anyone for like 4 months now. I've been going on dates here and there, but nothing seems to click lately. Mike moved back to florida today. I'm kinda depressed, but it'll give me a chance to start focusing on other aspects of my life, mainly school, rather then hanging out with friends all the time. I have my waterbed back finally. First time in 4 years. I got satin sheets and a down comforter for it...it's the most comfortable place in the world. It's so hard to make myself get out of it in the morning. I dunno...I'm writing lots of boring shit. I think it's time to get to bed. Gotta get up early and pick up nichcole...she's going to the doctor with me....then later i'm going to her doctor with her....of course her boyfriend knows nothing of this, or anything of me still...even though we're such good friends now days. whatever. Then off to school to register for classes. Then straighten out my new insurance policy for my car, so i can register it in mass. Doesn't that sound like an awesome day off? Well i can't wait. sleep well

what the fucks wrong with all you people....doesn't anyone have a fucking brain? http://willsimpson.org/archives/000104.html Whoever wants to leave the country with me....give me some suggestions, cause this place is populated with a bunch of retards.

Over the past few weeks since I've gotten back from Florida I haven't really done anything. Days just go by without any sort of meaning...it's just this boring routine. I've been working quite a bit...every sat i go with a few people to kareoke....it's usually a good time...and i think i'm getting better and better at the whole singing thing....last time i got a really good reaction after every song....if only i could do it sober. Nichcole and i have suprisingly become pretty good friends....at least it seems that way. She has to sneak around her 19 year old boyfriend to even talk to me, but when we do it's good and i can talk to her about other girls and she talks to me about mark(usually about fighting w/him)...and it's cool. I'm happy about it...but i have to admit, a small part of me can't get over how good we are together and wonders how the hell she'd rather be in the situation she is now. But whatever....it's for the best i think...i mean, i can't trust the girl at all. Anyways, right now I'm in my room while some ghetto rap shit is blasting in my living room. I want something different. My days are pizzas, angry/hungry fat fucks, cold, rap music, druggies, longing for intelligent discourse, solitude. I don't know what to do with the rest of the day. There's video games, going down to barnes and noble and drinking a coffee and reading a magazine by myself, stairing at the girl but never approaching, maybe making a cd. This weekend my parents are coming down and staying with us. That should be nice.

Tonight I went to a casino, then a club, then the beach. I just got home around 6 ish. It was one of the most amazing nights i've ever experienced. Renee drove up and suprised me tonight. Me, mike, renee and eugene went to the hard rock casino in tampa. After hanging out there for a little while we went to some club in ybor. Then around 4ish we got to the beach....after some village inn. After hopping the fence and racing eachother down the beach, we just sort of layed down. It must of been a good 45 min or so, but we were just laying there in complete silence, stairing into hundreds of stars as the waves methodically crashed against the shore. It was perfect. Here I had the two friends i care about more then anyone experiencing my favorite/most beautiful place in the world with me. For the first time in my life, tears formed in my eyes because of how happy i was. Now it's replaced by the thought of when will this ever happen again? It's been like three years since we've all been together...i hope the next time wont be in three more.

what a long fucking day

I feel like shit. This theraflu should put my ass out in an hour or so though. 4 more days and i get to get the hell out of here for a little bit and back to florida....i can't wait. Work was so long today...ugh...i was attempting to update this for the first time in a while....but there isn't really shit to say. Yesterday I went to my uncle and aunts place in the first time in a year and a half. It was cool...my parents went too. I'm glad my cousin and i talked a lot for the first time in years. We used to be really close a long time ago, when i was little...and every time we'd hang out, it was really hard for me to leave....she was kinda like a sister to me. Anyways...she made some stupid decisions and her life got pretty fucked up for a while...but yesterday it sorta got back to normal between us and i didn't realize how much i missed that until last night. So yea...I got her im and we're gonna keep in touch from now on. Alright...thats about it...everything else that's been going on is the same old shit. g'nite.

i'm slowly getting back to normal. I don't hang out with any of the losers that come over to chill with mike anymore. As a result, I'm not smoking at all anymore and drinking just every once and a while. Its kinda lonely lately cause i went from having like 15 people to hang out with to like 2. Nichcole and I don't talk at all anymore. It's been like a week and a half. I try to just ignore it, but I miss her quite a bit. But, whatever...she just used me and treated me like crap so I'm better off without her. She's officially back with the drug dealer piece of shit. I can't really blame her though...they've been together for a couple years now. Who's gonna turn down someone they've spent the last couple years of their life with for someone they've been hanging out with for a few months? Sigh. "Thanks, that was fun." I dunno...I feel very alone....friends/family are in all different parts of the country. Mike E is going off to Japan for who knows how long. I don't know what I'm doing. Just working, paying bills...trying to go to school this semester....doesn't look like it's going to happen...add/drop deadline is the end of next week. So that means another semester off, doing shit. I'm watching Bush spout off a bunch of bullshit right now on c-span...these dumb fucks in missouri are eating it up. If he gets re-elected I'm off to Canada....who's with me? Alright...thats all for now. sleep well

Jermey methodically gazed into the mirror, hoping to discover anything that could help explain all that has occured. From his upstairs bedroom he could hear the radio playing from mary's room and the tv blasting downstairs. The storm outside was causing the venetian blinds to continousouly smack against the pane. It was merly three days ago that he and sara were snuggled up together in this very room, laughing in unison to every punchline in the movie, feading eachother pop-corn. The realization that he and Sara made love just inches away from where he was currently standing made him sick to his stomach. Frantically, he switched from looking into the mirror to the actual room, then back to the mirror, again and again. Frustrated and confused, he screamed, "How could everything have changed so fast? Please God, tell me what the fuck is going on!" The ensuing silence engulfed Jermey in utter terror. "No, not again...no, please don't...